Week One

Well I started writing my letter. And then I came back to school…and the letter kind of went out the window. So I decided to simplify it.

I want happiness. I hope that I look back in May and smile, remembering the happy. Happiness with myself, my friends, my choices, my…everything.

I want to be irrevocably happy.

And I’d like to say I’m rather confident it’s going to be a pretty attainable goal if the last week is any indication of what the future holds :)

I am having the greatest time with some of the best people. The circle is widening, the light is shining even on the dreary rainy days, and I carry this happiness within my chest like a glowing orb of light. Poetic, eh?

I've already crossed off taking a trip to the 24/7 diner (at midnight) and a night of star-gazing on the baseball field from my To Do List.

Now about this whole love thing… ;)

Things are good. I’m good. Life is good.

Now I say this all pre-classes-starting aka pre-stress. But tomorrow’s the big day so only time will tell!

Until next time :)

I’m Not Lost

I’m not lost. I swear.

Apparently my grand plan to blog more this summer totally went out the window somewhere between conquering a mile-long book list, getting ready for my first 5K and going on adventures with my friends.

And I can’t say that I’m too sorry about that.

Because, well, I was living. And that’s something that I need to be doing more of.

With just one more week before I head back to one of my favorite places on this planet, I’ve decided that I need to write another letter to myself.

So that’s in progress—heavily detailed with how to do more of that living thing.

Be on the look-out for that soon :)

But for now, how about a quick, here’s what my summer looked like recap?

1. I hung out with my favorite kiddos. Oh their smiles…I’m gonna miss them :(

                

2. My girls (minus our favorite fourth) came for a visit to celebrate Tanya’s birthday.

3. Taylor and I went on lots of random adventures. We were bored. We needed things to do.

4. My sweet friend from high school, Kelsey, got married. Danielle, Taylor and I took advantage of our pretty dresses and took some fun pictures!

  

5. I ran. A lot. The girls and I are gearing up for our first 5K this fall and I’m super excited about it. More to come on this little adventure!

          

6. As I said at the beginning, I’ve read pretty long list of books this summer. I’m trying to cram my whole list in before I head back to school. Any John Green fans out there? Just started Looking for Alaska. Pretty sure he’s my new favorite author. And I’m on page 66. Yeah…

I’ve missed every body so much! Annie and I got caught up last night and I realized how much I’ve missed all my bloggie friends! So if you’re still out there reading, leave a little note in the comments—I’d love to catch up with you :)

I hope everyone has had a spectacular summer and I promise to be a much better blogger this upcoming year.

Now off to finish up that letter…if I can refrain from picking my book back up.

A Letter: Revisited

Well as of 8:34 this morning, sophomore year was officially over.

And that means that besides it being SUMMER!!, it is also time to read and respond to the letter that I wrote myself in August.

Truth be told, however, I may have read the letter last week. But at least I saved responding to it until the official end of the year :)

So I figured that I would just copy a few parts of the letter (you can read it in it’s entirety here) to read and reflect on.

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From my wish-list/to-do list…

:: Wednesday night IHOP runs.

There was only one IHOP night this semester, but there were quite a few last fall. Filled with pancakes and hot chocolate with whipped cream and lots of being loud with friends, nestled in a booth in the corner. I’m pretty sure we’re the costumers that every waitress fears getting stuck with—the loud and boisterous ones who joke and laugh through their meals.

IHOP nights might have slacked off, but Sheetz runs…oh my goodness. I am pretty sure that B and I spent every other night there last semester. And this semester there was just as many late night fried food and Slurpee trips.

:: Continue my no soda pact.

Mmm. Sorta.

I definitely don’t have it nearly as much as I used to…not even one a week. But I have had a few Cokes to get me through the late nights and rough days.

:: Take a nightly walk on the river.

This is one that I’m incredibly sad to say didn’t happen. B and I took many walks…in the daytime. We didn’t get down to the river at night this year, though :(

:: Try the You are Beautiful experiment.

Another thing I dropped the ball on…next year I am for sure doing this!

:: Do something big, spontaneously.

Mmm. Another thing I don’t think that I really did.

I guess I’m too much of a planner.

:: Go to Greece and Italy with the bestie.

Heck yes! We definitely did this and we did it well. There was lots of food, lots of wandering, and lots of wine. A trip that I will definitely remember for a lifetime.

I would go back in a heartbeat!

:: Miss my family and my cats.

I don’t think it is possible to explain how much I miss my family and my cats when I’m at school.

Yes, BC may be my place, but there are still those days where you want nothing more than a hug from your momma or a nap with your cat.

:: Take a drive to Moscow.

Didn’t happen :(

:: Turn my back on drama.

Two words: wishful thinking.

:: Be too loud.

Of course! Probably to the chagrin of some others.

:: Be a friend.

There is so, so much that I have learned about being a friend this year.

I started off strong on the whole, being a friend thing. There were many late nights and kitchen talks and river walks. Sitting around for hours just talking, from one random thing to the next. Then there were other conversations rooted in seriousness, faith and trust.

But then, I hate to even admit this, I kind of dropped the ball on some of the friendships that I hold nearest and dearest to me. I didn’t put as much time, care, and love into them as friendships truly need.

And by some great grace of God, I have been blessed with a group of friends who have not deserted me in my time of mindlessness and misgivings. These girls have stood by me, weathering this storm, and for that and for them, I will forever and ever be grateful. I know that I couldn’t have gotten through this semester without them.

So it is my duty now to go forth and be great friends to them once again. To remember their love for me and to return it tenfold.

:: Speak kindly and smile.

I know there have been many times this year that I haven’t spoken kindly. A few too many for my taste.

But overall, I think that I have spoken kindly.

And smiled through it all. Mostly.

:: Always love.

Kind of like speaking kindly…I know that there are times that I should have loved better.

:: Enjoy every singly minute of being a poorer-than-poor, college student.

Check.

There were many adventures had, many memories made, and a few mistakes…well, life lessons that needed to be learned, I suppose.

I want May 2012 Hannah to read this and smile, mentally checking off each of the must-do’s and adding all the other great memories that were made over the course of this next year.

I want May 2012 Hannah to be happy, and healthy and confident. I want her to be…wonderful.

So to May 2012  Hannah, I hope it has been one heck of year.  That you’ve done all these things and more. That you stayed true to yourself, hold some great friendships near to your heart, and found out even more about yourself.

I hope that when there were the bad days you remembered that these were still the best days of your life; that you were blessed and loved and could do anything your heart and mind desired to do.

Here’s to the next leg of our journey.

I don’t even know how to respond to this last little part.

Because the truth is, right now I don’t feel too happy or confident.

It’s been one heck of a year, I’ll give it that. A great one even, I’m not going to deny it.

I continue to hold many friendships near and dear to me and I have learned more lessons than I can count. If there is one thing that I can say without wavering: I have learned so much about myself this semester, this year really.

But it wasn’t all good days. We have to have the bad days to enjoy the greatness of good ones I guess.

The highs have been as high as the lows have been low.

The latest leg of my journey has not gone as expected and I find myself in one of life’s valleys. But I’m working through it and I know that the hill I’m going to come out of on the other side will be bright and sunny and beautiful.

I will not let this little bump in the road overshadow all the good days.

So here’s to finding the happy, confident Hannah once more.

-

Well that was a neat little experiment. One that I definitely think I will be trying again.

I’ve thrown myself into writing this semester. In my journal, writing letters I’ll never send, blogging.

It’s such a great way to document your life and the lessons that you’ve learned. And oh goodness, going back and rereading them—you don’t know whether to cry or to laugh. I guess that’s growing, though, right?

I guess since this is kind of a wrap-up of my year, how about the annual end of year video? For some reason, Vimeo isn’t letting me embed the video, but here’s the link: http://vimeo.com/41533724!

I hope everyone is having a good week! :)

It was Real, Y’all.

It’s been over a month. And I’m pretty sure the only reason I’m even writing now is to prolong studying for the 2 quizzes that I have tomorrow.

But I guess it doesn’t matter why I’m here, just that I’m writing again—at least in this little corner of the universe. My journal’s been getting quite the earful as of late.

I haven’t written about my amazing adventures in Athens, Rome, Florence and Venice in January. In all honesty, I haven’t even begun to edit the massive amounts of pictures that I have. I guess in some way going through, editing my favorites and having them printed makes it all too final that that chapter of my life is over.

I occasionally browse through them as they sit on my computer waiting, remembering all the sights, the smells, and the feelings. And it’s like I’m right back there again. It’s just me and the memories.

It isn’t that I don’t want to share. I just don’t want them to lose their magic…

I guess I understand now how hard it is to understand the beauty and amazingness of Greece and Italy without going there yourself so I just want everyone to appreciate it as much as I did. So when I do share, I’m going to try my hardest to encapsulate every moment of sheer epicness that I experienced in Europe.

But for now, I’m just going to share a couple group pictures that I’ve “collected” from Facebook.

It truly was the best 2 weeks of my life. I met some unforgettable people that I will never forget and I had some amazing adventures that I will carry with me forever.

And when I finally get around to closing that chapter of my life, I will share the pictures with you.

“It wasn’t lies, y’all. It was real.”

Now to get onto writing about the beginning of my spring semester…

Reflections and a Look Ahead

It’s that day.

The day to reflect.

It’s no lie that every time I read the world reflect, I laugh. Anyone reading this who is a Bridgewater Eagle of past or present will understand this one…oh PDP reflections.

But back on topic. Reflections.

So here it goes. This year…

There was the incident. I say with great confidence that it’s been mulled over quite enough now. It’s been John 13:7ed (read John thirteen sevened—yes, I did make that up) to death. I’m quite happy to be leaving that in 2011.

We found a new normal. The reflecting Hannah would say to this—is there ever anything remotely normal about this life, though?

I had one of “those days”. I think I can laugh at myself over all of that now…

I began the process of finding my place at BC…finding my people. There is so much that I want to say about each and every one of the people that I have come to call my friends at Bridgewater. More then I can say right now while being pressed (I’ve been watching too much Downton Abbey.) to get ready for tonight’s festivities. So a post about these lovely people is coming down the pike soon. For now—they are all so very important to me. I love them all.

We made some videos. I’m a star, didn’t you know? Ha. I crack myself up. But really…we made many videos—some professional and some very unprofessional.

Miss B turned one! And in the new year, Miss B will be getting a Mr. K! Yay for baby love!

I realized that I was alive. How very, very observant of me. But really, I did. This goes back to the finding my people thing.

I finished my freshman year of college. A huge triumph and a mini-mid-year-reflection at that.

I was enchanted (at the T. Swift concert, of course). Oh T. Swift. Why must you understand me so well? And your concert? It was absolutely enchanting.

I met Virginia and danced with Jagger. It was by far one of the best concerts I have ever been to—the awesome people I was with could have had something to do with it, too.

I wrote myself a letter. I didn’t read it yet—I promise. I’m half way through sophomore year so I’m hoping I’ve at least crossed off half the things on my to do list.

We had some awesome weekends and got into some shenanigans. Oh the things we’ve done this year.

We made some forever memories. This goes back to the finding my people thing.

This too shall pass. This also goes back to the finding my people thing. Sensing a theme to my life this year.

Homecoming weekend was awesome. Some of the reasons may have had nothing to do with Homecoming.

We attended Halloween costume parties and got into some more shenanigans. Tends to be what we do these days.

I was baffled. This year I found my people. This year was also a baffling year.

Christmas came once more. And it was amazing.

Man, what a year it has been.

Full of ups and downs.

Of making and keeping some of the best life-long friends a girl could have.

It’s been another year of getting a step closer to finding that key to being me.

All-in-all it’s been pretty awesome.

And I absolutely cannot wait to see what 2012 has in store. It seems that it’s already shaping up to be one of my best years yet.

As for resolutions?

My friend Carrie and I were trying to come up with some today on Twitter.

I think there’s just one thing I’m shooting for this year.

I hope that each of you has an amazing NYE and that 2012 brings every thing that you want and then some.

A Christmas Catch-Up

The fall semester has ended.

Christmas has passed.

And I’m just now blogging. Thank goodness I’ve picked up journaling or I would have completely missed a huge chunk of my life!

Shall we flip through the pictures (both Droid and camera) so I can remember what’s happened in the past 24 days?

The Semester Ended with a Variety Hour, Secret Santa and Goodbyes

Does my Secret Santa know me or what?! M, won Best Gift of the Year with my mockingjay necklace! I’m determined to get my friends as excited about The Hunger Games as I am!!!

Home Again! and an Adorable Christmas Play

I Made the Dean’s List (spending every day in the library paid off!)

Our table one night during Final’s week. Oh finals…

Christmas is the Time for Baking Cookies!

Christmas Eve Madness (aka the night of, “This Gift Might Not Be Yours…”)

Three Christmases in One Day

It seems it was so hectic that this is the only picture that I have on my computer from the day so far…

It was a great day no matter how crazy it was!

I think that about wraps up the past 24 days.

In one week I jet off for Greece and Italy with my best friend/roommate, my New Testament prof from last semester, and about 20 other BC Eagles for our Interterm class and I am sooooooooooooooooooooo excited. I still don’t think it has fully hit me yet, though! And Mr. Santa Claus even brought me a new zoom Nikon Lens for the occasion!

Now if I could only get my butt in gear to start packing—I loathe packing!

So if you don’t hear from me for another 24 days, you know where I am! :)

I hope that each of you had a wonderful Christmas and have a Happy New Year!

Everyday I Am Baffling

Remember the awkward week?

Well I think it could be agreed upon, as this semester comes to a close, that the real one-word descriptor for the year thus far could be baffling.

Seriously. I have never had my brain swirling with more unanswered, maybe even unanswerable questions, then ever before.

And it’s confusing and frustrating and intimidating and exciting and…the list goes on and on.

And I know that part of life is not knowing everything—it makes things more exciting. Some would even say that it’s the spice of life.

But really? How many unknown’s can one person handle?

I’m hoping that next semester brings a wave of answers, but really…with the way things are going, I’ll probably just have a million more questions.

And I think I’m starting to be okay with that.

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The end of a semester means the end of one of our friend’s time here at BC.

So we’re rushing to take as many pictures as possible.  We’re living these last few moments of memory-making to the fullest. We’re preparing for a shift in our group dynamic. We’re bracing ourselves for changes to relationships.

It’s a very bittersweet time. I know before the end there will be tears shed. But I also know that there will be laughs and smiles and hugs. Promises of reunions and future plans together. (There enters one of the many baffling questions that I have.)

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Some pictures of the past week or so…

    

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I hope that each of you has an awesome week! And for my college bloggie friends—good luck with your finals; we’re ALMOST done!!!!!!! :)