Woah. I just realized that it has been over 2 weeks since I last stopped by my little corner of the blogiverse.
And while most of my absence can be chalked up to lots of homework, many adventures, and tons of laughing, there’s also something more. I’ve been struggling lately with the pros and cons of blogging.
You see I used to be able to come here to share and vent with a group of anonymous friends who were able to help me in a way that I never expected; there is something truly remarkable about the sense of community you can develop from blogging. I never felt judged or belittled by what I shared, but rather comfortable and at ease. And it helped me a lot; to be able to just “dump” all I was feeling and experiencing in one place. The support that came with my “dumpage” was just an added bonus.
However, over the past six months as my blog has become more public to those around me—my real life friends and family—I’ve found myself second-guessing a lot of what I’ve shared. Is it too far? Did the wrong person see it?
And I hate it. I don’t want to censor my life to those here who have been such an anchor during this huge transition in my life. That’s not why I started blogging—I started this blog as a way to document my life honestly, like a journal so that one day I could look back and remember all of the ups and downs I’ve had in life.
But somewhere something got all screwy.
For the first time, I’m choosing to not post things—something I never thought I would ever do.
So I’m left here at a crossroad and I’m not sure where I’m headed next. Six months ago I would have been extremely stressed by this crossroads, this change. But something’s happened and it kind of excites me.
What should I do? Start a new blog and leave this one behind? Make this blog private and accept reader requests? Or leave blogging behind in turn for journaling?
The decision is all mine (though I wouldn’t mind some bloggie-friend-opinions) and I’m thrilled at where this crossroads will lead.
Posts
Oh Hannah! Don't stop blogging! I love reading what you write too much! Haha. I've personally been struggling on whether I should invite people I know IRL to read my blog as well, for now I'm going with no, but the thing is, people are going to judge no matter what. I just try not to let it bother me. People will always find something wrong with what you're doing, the trick is just to let it roll off your shoulder. I hope you find peace with whatever decision you make, just please promise you won't vanish altogether! :)
ReplyDelete~Abby :)
Only one IRL friend knows about and reads my blog. I haven't shared it with anyone else. I like it that way. I post what I want when I want. No pressure.
ReplyDeleteOh, Abby! Thanks so much for your kind words!! :)
ReplyDeleteMy roommate has been pretty convincing that I should keep blogging--she says it keeps me sane and I kind of have to agree with her. I'm leaning more towards starting a new blog...and you'll definitely be one of the first invited to read!
I wish I had kept it that selective, too. Really and truly. Lessons learned, huh? If only I knew then what I know now!
ReplyDeleteThis has been part of my problem with many of my IRL friends and family knowing about my blog. I try not to let my life outside of blogging affect my blogging life, but sometimes that happens.
ReplyDeleteI actually gave up blogging for Lent to wrestle with many of the questions you present here. I wish I could say I found some answers - but I'm not sure that I did. (I think I might find some as I get back into the hang of blogging, though, so stay tuned. :] )
I think also that there's a way to be honest and yet judicious about what you post, and I think maybe what both of us might be striving for is a way to make that balance work.
I so agree with your last statement; I need to figure out exactly how to balance blogging and my life. I think that starts by looking at exactly why I blog--because I think the reasons have shifted from when I first began.
ReplyDelete